Cha cha cha changes....

It's weird to me that to get inspiration to write again, I have to look back on old posts. Ha.

The cruise was awesome, months ago, but awesome. Rhea did not, in fact, end up going with me. She wanted to, but she had school and work to deal with, and the timing just wasn't right. However, I got the immense privilege of taking my younger sister with me. Now, I love spending time with my family, it's become one of my favorite things to do, and as I get older I realize more and more how much I love and care about them. But this trip was special. My little sister had never been to California, never out of Washington state, never on an airplane, and never out of the country. We went to Mexico, took two flights stopping in Salt Lake City and then on to LA where we embarked on the Sapphire Princess headed for Puerto Vallarta, Mazatlan, and Cabo San Lucas. And she got to do all this, with me. I cannot begin to describe how cool it was to see her face when we were thousands of feet above the earth on her very first flight. Priceless.

Since then, things have really gone up and down. Work was becoming tedious and annoying, and I considered looking for a new job, nearly daily. For a while, I was really struggling with relationship issues with Aaron (so what else is new), and have finally come to a place where I can be at peace in our relationship as it currently stands. I find myself, often, in the wrong frame of mind, thinking of Aaron as if he's already my husband, and it was taking a remarkably difficult tole on my life.  I found myself expecting him to act as a husband, and when I realized that he was not in fact so, I began slipping into a depression because he didn't want to marry me now. It wasn't long before we found ourselves on the verge of, what would have been, a really horrible break up. Thank the Lord that we were able to talk it out and He's been working in my life to show me that it is important to respect Aaron and where he's at in his life. Because, I honestly feel that if I can't learn to respect him now, before we're married, or even engaged, I'm going to have a really hard time doing so once we are.

A big reason Aaron and I seem to be doing so well, as of late, can be directly contributed to our participation in a Community Group. Mars Hill has been a really great place for us to go and learn about Christ on Sunday, but I understand now why they constantly encourage the church body to attend a CG.  Not only have I met some really amazing people, but I've been provided with people who are great examples in my life. I adore the CG leader, Scott, his wife, Atalie, and their two 10 month old children, Solomon and Ivy. They have been so sweet and caring since Aaron and I walked in the door the first day, and their children are adorable and remarkably well behaved (though Scott and Atalie still feel they can be a bit of a distraction, partially true, they make me smile every time I see them). And the encouragement I have received from other members of our CG, whether they realize they have been an encouragement or not, have been much needed and much appreciated.

I've found myself in a place now, where I can see the challenges in my life and am better prepared to face them head on. In the past, I was always a "dreamer", trying to pretend as if my life was better than what it was, instead of seeing the beauty that already existed around me. My relationship with Aaron is better than a lot of other relationships, and the fact that I have him at all is such an enormous blessing in and of itself. I don't deserve him, not at all. But then, I don't deserve Christ's love either, but that I receive unconditionally. Perfect love.

Work has been much better, I've been working a lot on my temper and patience, and it's been beneficial not only with friends and family, but also with work. I've found myself getting less annoyed and angry with callers or co workers. I can't say I'm perfect, and that I don't get frustrated on occasion, but the goal is to be as kind to those people as I can.








Sexy: How much I am loved by, and can love those people around me. :)
Unsexy: How long it's been since I blogged last... yeah, sorry about that.
Movies/TV Shows I've watched today: Dear Zachary, Letters to a Son About His Father, Three Blind Mice, and am just starting Jesus Camp (I've heard things about this documentary and am interested to experience it for myself, maybe I'll blog about it later.)

Nail Color: Clear base coat, my nails are almost healed from the craziness I put them through, I'm playing it safe for a little while. :)

New blogs I'm following: breethescarybear and nadiaesra